Man Gets Wish of Someday Dying
 in Warm Bed When Meteor Crashes

 into His Bedroom

Makers of Rabbit Sex Toy Take

Two-Prong Approach to 

Marketing Campaign

Congress Saddles Little Guy With the Bill

Nothing But Cry Babies and Fags in Man's

Court-Ordered Sensitivity Training

TSA Screeners to Play Barry White Music

During Routine Pat Downs

News Archives

G-20 Leaders Discuss Weather, 

Best Route to Summit

Greek Economy Taking A

Greek Style Pounding

Man Meets Dateline NBC's

To Catch A Predator Host

Longtime Fan Meets Chris Hansen, Then 

is Abruptly Taken Into Custody.

World's Oldest Boy Rejects 

Mother's Breast Milk

Flock of Seagulls Blamed For

Plane Crash, Shitty Music

Hillary Clinton Spends an Entire Career Advancing the Interests of Women Only to Wind Up Being a Secretary 

John Kerry Takes Over as Secretary of State.

Boy Named Hymen Mysteriously 

Explodes While Horseback Riding

Seemingly Strong Boy Suddenly Bursts into 

Red Mist. Pokey the Horse Was Not Injured.

Woman Sacrifices Career, Marriage

for Intervention Marathon on A&E

Charlie Sheen Upset to Learn Police

Escort Only Entails Ride to the Airport

Facing Elimination, Local Boy Changes

 Game of HORSE to HORS D'OEUVRES